Delusional and Pregnant, God Help Us

Just when I think that I finally have it all figured out.. I find out that I really have no clue what the heck I am doing. I find myself frazzled a lot lately. Maybe it is because I want things to be ready. Maybe I am nesting. Maybe I'm just being a worrywart. Who knows. Maybe it's because I really want things to be easygoing and simple. I want answers and I want them now.

I want to know that our delivery will be paid for and that we won't have to mortgage our arms and legs to pay for it. I want to know that our boy will be healthy and safe. I want to know that after he is born we will have all of our child care options weighed and figured out. I want to know that there is a plan and that it will all go as we hope. I want it all. I'm preggers, hear me whine!

Life really stresses me out to no end lately. I try so hard to just push it all to the back of my mind. I guess that stress comes with the territory of bringing a new life to the world. Becoming a mom doesn't start at birth.. it starts at conception. Most of the time I am pretty laid back and Kyle is really good about not letting things weigh him down too much. That helps me to not worry quite so much. He helps me to laugh and we do try to do our best to stay on the light side of things. To not let our stresses get the best of us. It's working well so far. I think that Brady is going to have some pretty stellar parents... if I do say so myself. It is my blog, after all.

On a more pleasant note, we have our first hospital tour tomorrow night. I'm pretty excited to go. I have been picking the minds of knowledgeable new moms about what to expect from this never ending process of paperwork and appointments. The hospital tour will show us where we can park in the middle of the night if we have to. We will be shown where to get admitted, where the nursery is. I'm excited because this makes everything seem even more real. It also freaks me the heck out. This means this is REALLY happening. This kicking boy in my belly will be out soon! Three more months!! I can't believe it.

I'm on the downward side of the pregnancy slope now. I really wish I was unconventionally wealthy. This way, I can just sit at home and daydream about our baby. Eat all the chocolate I want to and watch baby shows on TLC. I will be so calm and collected. But that would make for a very boring pregnancy. What is there to learn in life if it all goes "as planned" or if everything is easy. I suppose this is all to help us to grow. We will figure things out and when we look back, we will think how easy it all was and what the heck were we so worried about? Yeah, I'm delusional...